The Devil in the Details

"Energy flows where attention goes."

When we moved into our home three years ago, there were many pressing issues to address – plumbing, electrical… termites. And though we still have an endless list of projects to tackle, I feel like a lot of the big things are settled and I’m able to dig into the details. And it’s not just home stuff. Those questions of “where will our kids go to school?” and “will school even be open during this pandemic?” have made way for the smaller joys of “which after-school activities are we signing up for?” It’s those small choices that make life livable. And I’m very grateful to be in a place where I have time and energy for them.

And yet there is a constant stream of guilt that runs through my head when I get to take my time with things. In a generation where things like home ownership are a rarity, there’s a kind of survivor’s guilt that comes with being able to live life to some fullness. The sticker shock of my total at the Costco checkout feels like a slap in the face, screaming “waste!” even when I know I’m stocking up on household essentials we’ll inevitably pay more for elsewhere (Prices are fucking insane right now. Please pass along any deals in the comments).